Sep 28, 2009 | Day-of Coordinating, Parties and Special Events, wedding planning
This bakery had a good contract--and good chocolate. Photo by Carasco Photography.
I want to share with you some information I give to many of my clients. It’s on a subject that is hardly glamorous, but is very, very important: Contracts. I’m not a contract lawyer, but this is what I have learned by experience.
When you are planning a big celebration, you will have to deal with a number of vendors, and each one of them should give you a contract. And each one will require a certain amount of your attention. You should read carefully each contract you are given. Make sure you agree with every point in it before you sign it. Because once you sign it, it becomes a legally binding document that might be very hard to get out of. It’s much better to negotiate it before you sign it.
And all contracts are negotiable, no matter what your vendor says. The point of a contract is to come to an agreement between parties, so don’t be afraid to negotiate your part of the agreement. I’m not saying that you can get everything you want into (or out of) every contract, but you don’t have to take whatever they give you without a murmur if you don’t like it.
Every contract should contain a certain minimum of information. It should have the vendor’s name, address, and phone number on it. If the vendor wants you to contact them some other way than by phone, that information should also be on the contract so it is easily available. The contract should also state clearly exactly what the vendor is going to do for you and when they are going to do it. Likewise, it should say how much you are expected to pay and when.
It is a good idea to include details in the contract: When and where will deliveries be made? Will the vendor only bring their goods to the venue or will they also set things up? If you change your mind and want something extra, what happens? And what will it cost? What happens if one party or the other fails to live up to the agreement? Finally, the contract should be signed and dated by both parties.
Florists and bakeries (in my experience) are notorious for offering incomplete contracts. Often, small shops don’t have the resources to put together complete contracts. In this case, you should not hesitate to hand write the missing information onto whatever they give you. It protects both of you.
I learned some of this from my dealings with a certain florist. What passed for a contract with the bride from this florist was just a list of floral options and prices with one of them circled. There was no information on delivery or set-up. I understood from the bride that the florist was going to bring all the floral arrangements into the venue and I would set them up. I even discussed delivery with the shop in the week before the wedding. Oddly, no one mentioned that the centerpieces weighed between 50 and 100 pounds, somewhat more than I can carry on my own. The owner of the shop showed up with the centerpieces, carried them down a flight of steps, and placed them where they belonged. I thought all was well. Five days after the wedding, I got an e-mail from the floral shop asking for additional payment because the owner had had to do extra work on the delivery. Fortunately, I had a copy of the contract (such as it was) and was able to explain that they should not expect to recoup their losses from me. It also might have been better if a complaint had been made on the spot so I could have solved the problem before it happened.
That experience is also one of the reasons I always insist on having copies of every contract that a bride has with her vendors. I can head off a lot of trouble if I know exactly what is expected of each vendor. So, read your contracts, make sure you agree with their contents, and send a copy on to your planner. You’ll be happy you did.
Sep 21, 2009 | Budget Planning, Family Parties, Parties and Special Events, wedding planning, Weddings
Everyone trusts the vendors when there is no funny business. Photo by Magical Moments Photography.
If you have looked recently at the page on my website that deals with Money Matters, you might have noticed at the bottom that I have my integrity pledge there. In case you’re not familiar with how this scheme I mention works, let me lay it out for you here.
When I first hung out my (virtual) shingle as an event planner, vendors started getting in touch with me. They wanted me to refer my clients to them, and for the privilege, they were willing to pay me–in hard, cold cash–an amount equivalent to 10% of what my clients paid them for their work. I understand that this can be quite a good revenue stream for an event planner, but I am not willing to sell out for the cash. I always insist that the vendor give my client the equivalent discount, instead. It costs the vendor the same amount and it allows me to offer my clients a little bonus.
Taking the commission (as they call it) has several drawbacks. I work for the person who is paying me. If I were to take both a fee from a client and a payment from a vendor, then I would have two masters with conflicting interests. I would lose the ability to help my client stay within their budget, since my own personal interest would be for them to spend more. I also might be tempted to refer clients to the vendor who offers me the largest percentage, rather than the vendor who does the best work or gives the best value for money.
I heard a very telling story from a woman I know who makes and sells eco-friendly event invitations. She told me that she had been taking her wares around to various event planners. She was discussing the commission amount with one planner. The planner pointed to a wall of invitation sample books and told her that those vendors all offered her a much higher commission. She clearly expected that this woman would offer her more. And that is a situation that can lead to bidding wars, which can not be good for the planner’s clients.
When I first started out as a planner, I was pretty sure I would never take these kickbacks from vendors. But the thing that really gave me the resolve came from a very unexpected place. I took a taxi home from the very first wedding I ever planned and coordinated. The cab driver was an older gentleman, and we chatted on the way home. Of course he asked me what I do and where I was coming from. When I told him that I am a wedding planner, the first thing he said was, “You don’t take those payments from the vendors, do you?” I assured him that I do not take them. And I have never been tempted to go back on my word.
Aug 25, 2009 | Eco-Friendly Events, Parties and Special Events, vendors, wedding planning
Today I start a new series here on vendors I know and like. I’ll do an occasional profile of a vendor I have worked with to give you an idea of whether you might like to work with them, too. Today’s special guest is Dave Esau of Dave’s Specialty Foods in Mount Prospect, IL.
Dave Esau, courtesy of his website.
When you walk into Dave’s shop on West Prospect Ave., the eclectic decor and selection of local cheeses don’t tell you that you have stumbled on a French-trained chef who takes extraordinary care to select the best ingredients and prepare them as well as it is possible to do. But when you go to a tasting there, there is no doubt that you have found one of the best chefs in the area.
Recently, I took a client to Dave’s for a tasting. She had lined up a tasting with another caterer later that same day. Dave brought out a superb, tender chicken dish with a balsamic vinegar sauce and some stunning vegetables. He followed that up with just-sweet-enough desserts. He always gives potential clients the soft sell with his trademark cheerful attitude. The next day I heard from my client: She had cancelled her later tasting and decided to hire Dave. She knew (and I can confirm) that she wouldn’t find a better fit anywhere.
The other thing I really like about Dave is his commitment to local, organic, and sustainable food. This is not just an abstraction: It really shows in the quality of the food he serves. Quality, however, does not translate to outrageous price. I am always pleasantly surprised at how much you get for the reasonable prices he charges.
So, when you’re looking for a caterer, include Dave Esau on your list. He is located in the suburbs, but he works all over the Chicago area. It’s definitely worth the trip to his little shop by the train tracks to taste his food!
Aug 18, 2009 | Budget Planning, wedding planning, Weddings
The bride's friends made the centerpieces for this wedding.
A friend of mine who recently got married told me something she learned in the course of planning her wedding. For some reason or another, she was talking to a lawyer who specializes in divorce (having nothing to do with her wedding, of course!) They were discussing the size of her wedding budget, which I understand was quite modest, since she works as a free-lancer and her husband is a graduate student. This lawyer told her that he had noticed an interesting correlation in the course of his work. According to him, the larger the wedding budget is, the shorter the marriage is likely to be. I can’t account for this surprising parallel, but I can say this: If you are planning a wedding on a small budget, you can at least console yourself that, statistically speaking, your marriage is more likely to be a lasting one.
Aug 3, 2009 | Budget Planning, Day-of Coordinating, etiquette, wedding planning, Weddings
"Shall we tip the limo driver?" Photo by Happy Buddy PhotoArt.
I get asked sometimes about tipping wedding or party vendors. Now, I’m not an etiquette expert, but here is what I know. My rule of thumb is that it is never wrong to tip someone if they have provided you with exceptional service. If someone goes above and beyond the call of duty, you will never be wrong to show your appreciation in a tangible way. For most vendors, however, tipping is still optional.
There are some exceptions to that last rule, however. Food servers, hair stylists, and drivers are some of the people whom it is customary to tip. Your catering contract probably includes a gratuity. If so, then you have already tipped the staff. If you want to show further appreciation, you may, but it is not necessary.
If your stylist or limo driver is also the owner of the company, then it is not customary to tip, because they already have the full benefit of the payment you are making. I heard recently about a hair stylist who works for herself. She was going to charge $150 for a simple updo and then wanted an 18% tip on top of that. I recommended to the bride-to-be that she find a different stylist, as in that case the tip is a form of highway robbery.
I understand that it is also not customary to tip musicians. But the first rule still applies: Anyone who gives exceptional service might merit a reward. But don’t stress over tips. Most independent contractors don’t expect them and they are a very pleasant surprise if you do give one.
Jul 19, 2009 | wedding planning
This bride asked only her sisters to be her bridesmaids--a wise choice! Photo by Magical Moments Photography.
In addition to the stories I know about dealing with parents and fiancés, I have heard some horror stories about bridesmaids, too. A wedding is a good time to think very hard about your friendships. When you ask someone to be a bridesmaid, you are pretty much asking for her life-long friendship. You are also asking them to do quite a bit of work and to shell out a lot of money for you. A good rule of thumb is to ask people to be in your wedding if they are close family, friends of the family, or people you have been close to for a long time. Someone you have known for a year or two may or may not turn out to be bridesmaid material. It is better to be safe than to be sorry. Wanting to have a big bridal party is not a good reason to ask someone. Ask yourself: Who are you close to? Who do you trust? Who would you do anything for? Would they do anything for you in return? Who do you think you will be close to in your married life? Those are the people you want around you on such an important occasion.
Also, discuss with your wedding party your expectations for them. Don’t assume that they know what you want. Make sure they know what they are getting into before they agree, including a specific discussion of who will pay for what and how much it will cost. This will save many headaches later.
If you make an effort to deal well with your parents, your fiancé, your friends and your family, you will have lots of help with your planning and a minimum of conflict.
Recent Comments