What I Know About Tipping

"Shall we tip the limo driver?" Photo by Happy Buddy PhotoArt.

I get asked sometimes about tipping wedding or party vendors.  Now, I’m not an etiquette expert, but here is what I know.  My rule of thumb is that it is never wrong to tip someone if they have provided you with exceptional service.  If someone goes above and beyond the call of duty, you will never be wrong to show your appreciation in a tangible way.  For most vendors, however, tipping is still optional.

There are some exceptions to that last rule, however.  Food servers, hair stylists, and drivers are some of the people whom it is customary to tip.  Your catering contract probably includes a gratuity.  If so, then you have already tipped the staff.  If you want to show further appreciation, you may, but it is not necessary.

If your stylist or limo driver is also the owner of the company, then it is not customary to tip, because they already have the full benefit of the payment you are making.  I heard recently about a hair stylist who works for herself.  She was going to charge $150 for a simple updo and then wanted an 18% tip on top of that.  I recommended to the bride-to-be that she find a different stylist, as in that case the tip is a form of highway robbery.

I understand that it is also not customary to tip musicians.  But the first rule still applies:  Anyone who gives exceptional service might merit a reward.  But don’t stress over tips.  Most independent contractors don’t expect them and they are a very pleasant surprise if you do give one.