Wedding Schedules: Fact or Fiction?

Remember: The schedule is a guide, not a rulebook. Courtesy of sprungphoto.com.

One of the most important things I do for my wedding clients is create a schedule for the day of the wedding.  This can start with hair and make-up appointments and go on to photographs, ceremony, reception, and after-party, if need be.  Where most people get bogged down is in the reception: How long does it take to serve and eat dinner? What time should the cake be cut?  When does the dancing begin?  Are the toasts during dinner or before it?

Because I have made up so many wedding and reception schedules, I have a good idea of how long things will take and when they should happen.  But I’ll let you in on a little secret:  On my version of the reception schedule, I rarely put exact times any more.  While wedding ceremonies often start and end more or less on time, and cocktail hours are often just about an hour long, everything else at a reception is not likely to go by the clock.  It’s more important (to me) to know that the toasts happen after the salad is served (whatever time that ends up being) and that the bride and groom’s first dance is after dessert (whenever that happens) than the clock time that is on the schedule.

One time, a bride had created a schedule for her wedding day that was precise to the minute about when things should happen.  It turned out that the ceremony was ten minutes shorter than had been planned, so the cocktail hour started and ended ten minutes early.  When I went to get her for introductions before dinner, she was reluctant to go ahead because it was earlier than the scheduled time.  I had to talk her into doing things a few minutes early by reminding her that the guests had not seen the schedule and didn’t know that we were off our timing.  I thought it was better to treat the schedule as a guideline (if not an inspired work of fiction) rather than have the guests sitting at their tables for ten minutes waiting for something to happen.

So, do make up a schedule for your wedding day.  Do include all the things you want to have happen.  But don’t be surprised if it doesn’t all happen at the exact time you thought it would.