Here are a few shots I took at a lovely, very small wedding in June at the Orrington Hotel in Evanston. I hope to have the professional photos later so you can see the rest of what it looked like.
The room at the Orrington was decked out for the reception.
Here's a close-up of one of the place settings.
MilleFiori did a lovely job with the flowers.
The sweetheart table for the newlyweds.
I thought their signs were cute.
Here's the cake with more flowers.
You’ve booked your reception venue and made your guest list. Now you have to figure out where people will sit at the reception.
Your planner or the venue may have one good question to get you started: Do you want to have long tables or round tables? Or both? There are good things to say about each, as well as some drawbacks. (It also happens that a venue stocks one or the other and if you want something different, you have to rent them. Do keep that in mind, as well.)
Large round tables seem to be the standard for wedding receptions. They look elegant, and there is a lot of table space for outstanding centerpieces. But all that table space means that with round tables, you can fit fewer guests into your reception venue.
Here's a classic use of round tables at a wedding reception. Photo by hannahelaine photography (hannahelaine.com).
Obviously, you can’t exceed the number of guests that the fire marshal rates the hall for, but if you have more guests than will fit at round tables, it might be time to consider long tables (also called banquettes, for whatever reason*).
Round tables can also be casual. Photo by Magical Moments Photography.
People sometimes think that long tables are more casual, but long tables can be perfectly elegant when they are draped and dressed well. They also have the advantage of bringing your guests closer to each other at the table, making conversation easier across the table.
Here's a beautiful use of long tables. Photo courtesy of christytylerphotography.com.
You also have the option of doing some long tables and some round tables. I’ve seen this done to excellent effect at wedding receptions. It’s a little trickier to do the layout this way, but that’s no reason not to try it.
(*A banquette, for what it’s worth, is actually a long, upholstered bench against a wall, the kind you might sit at if you’re sitting at a row of long tables.)
The guests never know if something is awry. Photo by Hannah Elaine Photography (hannahelaine.com).
One of the things I like about wedding planning is that it is full of surprises. Unfortunately, not all of them are the pleasant kind. I coordinated a wedding recently where I found myself saying words that no one wants to hear coming out of their mouth. It went like this:
“Hello, gas company? I’d like to report a gas leak.” I gave the address. “I need you to send someone right away. Please send someone really discreet, because there are 150 guests here for a back yard wedding.”
It was about 15 minutes before the ceremony in the back yard of a beautiful North Shore home. The caterer was using the coach house kitchen, and we kept smelling gas in the garage below the kitchen. All the family members had gone a few blocks away for pre-ceremony photos, so I was the logical person to make the call. I figured that the disruption of a service man arriving would be less than the disruption of a gas explosion!
Fortunately, the people at the gas company understood the situation, and the man who came to turn off the gas came and went before the ceremony started without even making a ripple. When the family returned, I explained to the bride’s father what had gone on in their absence. And then we started the processional, without anyone else being the wiser.
Here is a very small sample of the dresses you will see. Yes, that's Hello Kitty.
Sometimes planning a wedding or other event can be stressful. So, what do you do to blow off steam a little? How about looking at ugly bridesmaid, prom, and wedding dresses? Ugly Dress.com is usually good for a laugh or two.
Full-service caterers create a beautiful buffet. Photo courtesy of christytylerphotography.com.
I have noticed that there is often some confusion about caterers and what they do. I’d like to lay out the distinction between “catering” and “full-service catering” for you.
Any restaurant, chef, or catering company can do “catering.” That might be as simple as bringing big foil pans of food to your location and dropping it off–along with a few napkins and plastic forks, if you’re lucky. Especially when restaurants say that they do “catering,” often they mean only that they can make quantities of food for a crowd and bring the food to you.
“Full-service catering,” on the other hand, is almost always done by companies that specialize in it. The services offered by full-service catering companies generally include:
A full-service caterer can take care of many of the details that otherwise cause headaches to those who are planning parties.
You might wonder, then, why would I need my own event planner if I hire a full-service caterer? The answer is easy: The event planner you hire is your advocate who is there to supervise all the vendors, including the caterer, to be sure they do what you have requested. Your event planner coordinates among all the vendors, looking out for your interests at all times.
Of course, if you must have your favorite restaurant cater your event and they do not provide full-service catering, consider hiring an event planner early. Your event planner can work with companies that provide servers and bartenders; recommend rental companies and work with you on rental lists; plan the timing and layout for your event; and make sure it all runs like clockwork.
This garter was not seen by the guests at the wedding at all. Photo by hannahelaine photography (hannahelaine.com).
I’ve noticed a trend at weddings lately, and it’s something that is not done, rather than any other kind of innovation. More and more of the couples I have worked with have done without the traditions of the bouquet toss and the garter toss. I’m not sure if this is just my clients, or if the phenomenon is more widespread.
There could be several reasons for this trend:
It could just be a fluke. That’s what I thought at first when it was only two or three couples in a row.
It could be that couples who want to work with me are already thinking about doing things non-traditionally. Maybe the bouquet toss is still popular outside of my little niche.
It may be that as wedding planning becomes more elastic, it becomes easier to dispense with things that have no resonance for individuals. Or as people marry later, they want more sophistication in their celebrations.
The bouquet toss becomes less attractive when more of the bride’s female friends are already married. I’ve seen DJs cajoling women onto the floor to catch the bouquet when there were very few single women present.
The garter ritual has gotten a bad reputation, not only because it can be done in a way that may be offensive to some sensibilities, but because its unsavory history is beginning to be known. (Apparently, in the Middle Ages, it was customary for the local men to rip clothing off a newly married bride to “loosen her up.” Brides began carrying extra garters to throw to them in hopes of escaping.)
None of this is to say that these traditions can’t be done any more. I’m sure there are many weddings every year where the bride tosses the bouquet and where the garter is tossed to all the single men present. But I have noticed that many people are rethinking these traditions and deciding for themselves whether or not they want them at their wedding.
Try a beautiful outdoor location for your celebration.
I’m thinking about locations for eco-friendly weddings and events. There are many choices you can make to have a sustainable location for your event. The place you choose can have a large impact on how sustainable your celebration is.
For example, you can choose a LEED certified building, or rent from and support a location that has an environmental mission, such as a botanic garden or organic farm. You can also look at the Green Hotels Association to find a hotel with an environmental commitment. Or you can find an eco-friendly restaurant through the Green Restaurant Association. Celebrating outdoors, of course, reduces the power needed for lighting and air conditioning. If you’re having more than one event on the same day (such as a wedding and reception), you can have them in the same location to reduce the amount of transportation needed.
There are lots of easy things you can do to make your wedding or other celebration more eco-conscious. Every little bit helps!
Here is a tiny taste of a wedding I did early in the summer. It was in the back yard of the bride’s parents’ home, and it was lovely. Professional photos are coming in a couple of weeks. This is just a teaser.
The guests entered from the side yard.
This is how the tent looked after it was set up for the reception.
The centerpieces were potted herbs.
The guests took home the individual plants from the centerpieces.
The back yard setting was a beautiful place for a wedding.
Give some thought to all the paper products you want for your wedding. Photo by Paul Grigonis, pplusgphoto.com.
While venue, food, and transportation are going to have the largest environmental impact, the amount of paper involved in invitations makes it a worthwhile way to green your wedding. It’s pretty easy to have eco-friendly wedding invitations.
Here are some easy ways to minimize the impact of your party invitations:
There are also invitation suppliers who specialize in eco-friendly invitations. Look around in your area for designers and printers who use environmentally friendly techniques. (I know a few in the Chicago area.)
While you’re thinking about invitations, you can also give some thought to the other paper products you might want for your wedding: place cards, menus, programs, etc. Using recycled paper and non-toxic inks, or finding ways to use less paper are ways you can green your wedding.
Expect to have to remind people to respond to your invitation.
The typical modern wedding invitation not only says, “RSVP” or “The favor of a reply is requested,” but it also contains a pre-printed reply card and a postage-paid envelope. Despite the ease of replying, many of those honored with a wedding invitation never reply.
According to Miss Manners, there ought to be no need to request a reply, much less enclose a card. Anyone receiving an invitation is supposed to know to reply with a hand-written note in the style of the invitation.
As anyone who has sent out invitations knows, though, the immediate reply is the exception rather than the rule. The unfortunate fact is that after sending out invitations, it will be necessary to follow up with your guests. There will be some who don’t reply, either with an acceptance or with regrets. There are those who don’t reply “because of course I will be there” and there are those who don’t reply “because I can’t make it, anyway.” Unfortunately, you never know which of those is the case.
Expect to call or e-mail your guests starting about three weeks before your wedding. You will need to know how many are coming so you can tell your caterer, so be polite, be persistent, and try not to think about what Miss Manners would say.
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