I was at one of my favorite venues the other night, the Redfield Estate at The Grove in Glenview. It was a vow renewal ceremony for the couple, and they had a great time with their family and friends. Here are a few pictures that I took of the reception.
Should you ask your guests to throw bird seed instead of rice? (Photo by Peter Coombs.)
I bet you’ve heard this one: You shouldn’t throw rice at weddings because the birds will eat it and the rice will swell up inside of them and they will explode. Did you ever wonder if it is true? I certainly believed it when I first heard it, but something about it started to seem not quite right. So I looked into it.
And it turns out that it is totally not true!! No one seems to be quite sure where the idea came from originally. The first place it is documented is the Connecticut state legislature in 1985, but its origins before that are shrouded in mystery. The story spread, though, despite attempts by ornithologists to correct it. For some reason, the idea of pigeons exploding seemed to capture the collective imagination. Think about it, though: Did you ever see a bird explode? Or see the remains of one that had? Me neither.
A university biology professor proved this conclusively (as told in this article) by, first, simulating the conditions of grain inside a bird and, finally (and only at the insistence of his students), feeding rice to his own pet doves and pigeons. The result? No exploded birds. In fact, they seemed to like it a lot. It turns out that birds eat rice in the wild all the time without any harm.
So, what does this mean for your wedding? Can you encourage your guests to throw rice (should you wish to follow the ancient tradition)? First, check the contract with your venue. Some venues specifically prohibit throwing rice or birdseed or confetti or various other things that are difficult to clean up. If it is permitted, also keep in mind that small grains on a hard surface (like a sidewalk) can be a slipping hazard for people wearing slippery shoes–such as your guests who are wearing their best clothes. If you want to be on the safe side, skip the tradition. If you do decide to do it, you know the birds will thank you.
Even a very small wedding can benefit from having a coordinator.
There are two major reasons people don’t hire a wedding planner or coordinator: First, they think they don’t need one. Second, they think they can’t afford one. I’ll address the first issue in a couple of weeks, although I’ve written about it before. Today, let’s talk about how a wedding planner or coordinator has an impact on your wedding budget.
Hiring a day-of coordinator for your wedding can add a few thousand dollars to your budget (depending on which coordinator you hire). It’s usually less than 10% of the budget, unless you have a very small budget. Is that the end of its impact on your budget? Hardly!
When you hire a coordinator, you can actually save money. And the earlier you hire, the more likely your coordinator will be able to help you save money. One of the things that makes weddings expensive is the fact that a great many people getting married have never planned a wedding before and can get trapped into spending more than necessary.
That is one of the reasons why I encourage my clients to keep in touch with me as they plan. Let’s say you hire me to coordinate your wedding as soon as you have a date, maybe a year in advance. You can always drop me a note or call me up when you have a question or problem. Chances are, I have an economical solution.
I was talking to a woman recently who was a couple of months away from her wedding. She was thinking about hiring a coordinator, but before we were able to have a discussion about it, her budget blew up and she decided she couldn’t afford me. I kept thinking what a shame it was that she hadn’t hired me much earlier and given me a chance to prevent the budget blow-up in the first place.
So, when you’re making your budget, include a reasonable amount for coordination. In the long run, your budget will thank you.
I had a huge amount of fun with this wedding last September. The bride and groom had unique and fun ideas for their wedding day, and they did it in their own style. It was one part wedding and one part kiddy carnival–and eco-friendly to the core. They rented a lake house in Wisconsin and made sure that everyone had a good time. It was a wonderful wedding!
You could tell from the moment you arrived that this wedding was like no other. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
The lemonade stand was a give-away, too. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
It had rained in the morning, so the bride and her family hung up family photos in the early afternoon. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
Skipping stones were ready for the lake. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
Something for everyone on the picnic tables: flowers and crayons. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
Finally, everything was ready. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
The processional went from the house down to the waterfront. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
Even the baby was part of the festivities. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
It was a beautiful ceremony, with officiant Rev. Darrell Jones. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
And then the fun started with lawn games and barbecue. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
Jana Kinsman brought her Doodlebooth to the party. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
Both kids and adults had their faces painted. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
The kids had lots of fun things to do (and so did the bride). Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
It’s possible that the grown-ups had even more fun than the kids. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
There was even cotton candy. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
The bride and groom saw to it that everything was composted or recycled. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
There was even a chance to dance to the music provided by the DJ. Photo by Ryan Timm Photography.
I worked with this really fun couple last fall on their wedding at the Levy Center in Evanston. They did everything to their own personal taste, so it turned out really wonderful. Check out these photos.
You could tell right off that this was not going to be an entirely traditional wedding. Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.
Rabbi Debra Nesselson was their terrific officiant. Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.
The bride carried a decorated lantern instead of a bouquet. Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.
Can you tell that they were a little excited? Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.
Since both bride and groom are gamers, here’s the bride with her wedding dice. Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.
Instead of spending a lot of money on decorations, they asked their guests to dress up. Here’s their MC. Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.
Table decor was appropriately goth. Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.
Here’s another look at the decor. Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.
The MC helps a member of the wedding party give a toast. Yes, it’s actual toast. Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.
Of course there was dancing. Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.
Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.
There were also games for the guests. Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.
There was no cake at this wedding, but this is what decorated the ice cream bar. Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.
I am so fortunate to work with wonderful clients. I was privileged to work on some exceptional weddings in the last year, and I’m very grateful to have been able to help such terrific people get married–in all sorts of settings and in all their own different styles. I’m looking forward to working with even more lovely clients this year. Will you be one of them?
(Photo credits: 1 & 2 by anonymous photographers; 3: Photo by Studio Finch Photography, www.studiofinch.com; 4: Photo by Ryan Timm Photography; 5: Photo by Danielle Heinson Photography.)
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