Jan 5, 2010 | Day-of Coordinating, wedding planning, Weddings
This is me, doing what I do best as a day-of coordinator: sweating the details so my clients don't have to. Photo courtesy of Artisan Events, Inc.
This post is from exactly a year ago. If you are newly engaged, I hope you will find it helpful.
If you have plans to get married this year, you are probably thinking–right about now–about hiring a wedding planner or a day-of wedding coordinator. If you’re getting married this year and are not thinking about any such thing, may I recommend that you do so before the best planners get booked up for the summer and fall seasons? I don’t know about anyone else, but I am almost fully booked for Saturdays in June already.
It’s not too difficult to hire a day-of coordinator. You will actually come up with more choices if you do an internet search for “wedding planner,” rather than “day-of wedding coordinator.” Any wedding planner worth her pay is also a day-of coordinator. Craigslist is another place to look. You can also place a free ad there for planners to respond to.
Once you have found a handful of prospects, it’s time to interview them. You can start with an e-mail, of course, but I don’t recommend that you hire anyone until you have met them in person. Sometimes this is impractical, of course, especially if you live in a different city from the one you are planning to marry in. In that case, be sure to have a detailed telephone conversation before signing a contract. Some of the things you may want to consider are: the planner’s experience and expertise; the planner’s personality and how it fits with yours; the kinds of ideas she or he can bring to the table; the fee charged and what you will get for what you pay.
Don’t necessarily think that the lowest price is the best deal. As with any vendor, you get what you pay for. Sometimes the person with the lowest price is the best one for the job, but other times someone with a very low price may not offer as many important services as someone who charges a little more. Get enough information on the services included in the fee so that you can tell the difference. Find out what the price range is by asking several coordinators. You don’t have to hire the most expensive one, but you will probably find one in the middle of the price range who has all the characteristics you want.
Before you hire, get references. Don’t just get names and phone numbers or e-mail addresses. Call those people or e-mail them and ask them questions about their experience with the coordinator. Ask them if they would recommend the person. Ask them if they think they got value for their money. Ask if there were any unresolved problems.
Finally, don’t pay anything until you have a signed contract with the coordinator. (This is actually good advice for hiring any vendor.) The coordinator will probably send you a contract, but don’t assume that this is a “take it or leave it” proposition. All contracts are negotiable. If there is a clause you think needs to be in the contract, ask to have it added. If you don’t like something, ask if it can be removed. You may have to give something in return, but it is always worth a try. Don’t be intimidated by legalese. If there’s anything you don’t understand, ask to have it clarified. And only sign the contract once you are sure you understand everything and agree with it. It takes some work, but it is always worth while to have a good contract in place. It protects both parties.
And once you have hired a wedding coordinator, keep them informed of your decisions. If they ask for information, get it to them as soon as possible. They are looking out for your best interests and need to know what you want and what you are doing so they can take care of all the details while you are busy getting married and enjoying yourself.
Dec 21, 2009 | Day-of Coordinating, Weddings
I’ve received new photos from the wedding in November I wrote about a few weeks ago. You can view them here:
Photo courtesy of sprungphoto.com.
Dec 14, 2009 | Budget Planning, Parties and Special Events, wedding planning, Weddings
It’s time to rerun my budget event series for everyone who is getting ready to plan a wedding or party on a shoestring. Here is part one of the series, for those who missed it around this time last year:
Just because you are on a budget doesn’t mean you can’t have the event you want. It requires some extra work and maybe a few compromises, but you can still get married or have a bar mitzvah or throw the party for your parents’ anniversary and have a real celebration. Working on a budget is something I do a lot, so I’d like to share some of my insights with you.
It's about the money.
The first thing to do is to have an actual budget. This is sometimes an item that people put off, but I urge you to come up with a realistic budget as early in the planning process as you can. It will help to guide your choices as you plan your event. The main reason for procrastination, I think, is the simple fact that many people do not know how to go about preparing a budget. Here is my method:
Start with the total amount of money you are able to spend on the event. Be realistic about your ability to spend, including any contributions others have committed to making. It is not worthwhile to spend more on any event than you have. Unless your circumstances are unusual, it is not generally a good idea to go into debt for a wedding or other celebration. I also do not recommend spending everything you have for one day’s celebration.
Next, list all the things you intend to spend money on. Include everything you think you might need, and add a “just in case” category. For a wedding, your list might look something like this:
Band/musicians/DJ
Cake
Candles
Caterer/restaurant
Ceremony venue
Clothing
Contingency
Dish rental
Event planner
Favors
Flowers/décor
Furniture rental
Gifts
Guest directions
Invitations
Ketubah
License
Limo/transportation
Linen rental
Liquor/champagne
Menu
Officiant
Other rentals
Photographer
Place cards
Postage
Program book
Reception venue
Rings
RSVPs
Save-the date cards
Sound equipment
Table numbers
Tips
Unity candle or sand
Videographer
This is not to say that you have to include everything on the list. I don’t think I have ever worked on a wedding that spent money in each and every one of these categories. And some events require things that are not on this list. Pick the ones that pertain to your event and make a spreadsheet.
Now comes the hard part: Fill in a number next to each category and make sure the total does not exceed your total budget number. (Computer spreadsheet programs such as Excel make this job much easier.) But how do you know what number to put there? You will have to do some research. Talk to vendors and other professionals (such as an event planner). Poke around online to get a range of prices. Decide what things you can do yourself to save money and what things will require professional services. For example, you might make place cards and table numbers yourself at minimal cost, if you have the time. In a future post, I will take a look at some of the more difficult categories and consider ways to estimate and reduce costs in each. (Or you can see where this is still posted from March and July of 2009.)
The creative bride of this wedding made her own programs, place cards, and even her own flower arrangements.
Finally, if your cost estimate exceeds your resources, you will have to find places to cut. You may have to reconsider how you define what you need and remove some categories, or you might have to make do with smaller quantities or lesser quality on some things. You can also consider cutting the guest list. These decisions are not easy, but keep in mind that the most important thing about any celebration is not how opulent it looks but what happens between the people. If it’s a wedding, getting married is the most important thing that will happen. If it is an anniversary or birthday party, the important thing is to honor the ones who have reached a milestone. If you can manage a lavish entertainment in addition, consider it a bonus.
Nov 9, 2009 | Day-of Coordinating, wedding planning, Weddings
My photo of the gallery set up for the ceremony.
Wedding planning is, in part, about putting together a great team of people who will make your wedding as perfect as possible. In the case of the wedding I managed on Saturday night, the two women who were marrying found exactly the right people. I am happy to say that I was of some help making it all go according to plan, including guiding them to some of the team members.
They called me just about a year ago needing help finding the right wedding vendors. They had their location already, the Black Walnut Gallery in the West Loop. It is a small, intimate art gallery with a back courtyard. It was the perfect size for a wedding with 35 guests (although the gallery will easily accommodate more guests).
The next thing they needed was a caterer. I recommended two caterers for them to try. First, they had a tasting with Dave at Dave’s Specialty Foods. After meeting with him and tasting his food, they canceled their other tasting. Dave was hired! I was thrilled for them because I knew they had made a very good choice.
They hired Victoria Sprung as their photographer. And we used BBJ Linen and Arlington Rental for linens, tables, chairs, dishes, and all the other necessities. The flowers came from a florist in their home town in Wisconsin. I never met her, but she did a beautiful job. Finally, they hired Rev. Rebecca to perform the ceremony. They found her independently, but she was the officiant I was going to recommend if they had asked.
Flowers on the bar, with some art in the background.
Good planning always pays off. I had gone over all the details with everyone, making changes as necessary, so when the day of the wedding arrived, everyone was ready to make a beautiful day for them. The servers set up tables, chairs and the bar; I set place cards, flowers, and decor for the ceremony; Dave put together his kitchen in the basement of the gallery and prepared to dish out splendid food; Reverend Rebecca arrived and began to give the place an air of sanctity. A few friends and family members pitched in to set up because they wanted to, but no one felt stressed. Even the weather cooperated with sunshine and 60 degrees in November.
Finally, it was time for the ceremony. Everyone commented on how personal and meaningful it was. Vows were made and rings were exchanged in a very moving manner. And then a celebration was in order.
While the guests enjoyed drinks and appetizers in the warm, candle-lit courtyard, the servers brought in the tables, as if by magic. I placed the ribbons, flowers, candles, and flower confetti on the tables while the tables were set. Dinner and dancing followed. Everyone worked together like a well oiled machine to make sure that all the guests had a good time. And at the end of the evening, I called cabs and congratulated the families on a very happy occasion. All the hard work that went into planning really paid off.
In a few weeks, I hope to showcase some of Victoria’s photos of the wedding here. From what I could see, hers are much nicer than mine.
Nov 2, 2009 | Family Parties, wedding planning, Weddings
I get a lot of questions from my clients about when to send out invitations. Here are a few guidelines to get you through this part of wedding or party planning:
You can send out save-the-date cards (or e-mails, or you can make phone calls) about six months in advance. If you have guests who might come from overseas or who have other situations that require more notice, you can alert them to the date a year in advance. Most people have trouble planning anything more than a year in advance, though, so if you tell people farther ahead than that, expect to remind them at about the 6 to 9 month mark.
Be prepared to put your invitations into the mail six to eight weeks before the event. Leave yourself ample time to address all the invitations if you are doing them yourself. If you are hiring a calligrapher to address them, be sure to ask him or her how much time is needed for the number of invitations you have. Then add a week, just to be on the safe side.
Your RSVP deadline should be about three weeks ahead of the wedding or party. (If you only plan to get the invitations into the mail six weeks ahead of the wedding date, you can get away with about 2 weeks for the RSVP date.) Your caterer will probably want a final head count between a week and two weeks ahead of the date, and you want to leave yourself enough time to call the people who have not responded by the deadline.
And there will be people who don’t respond. Be sure to leave yourself enough time to call them and just check in. You don’t have to remind them that they have been rude enough not to reply. Just ask them if they plan to be there (and what they plan to eat if you have asked people to tell you in advance). Don’t skip this step. You don’t want to have people show up if you haven’t planned to feed them.
Your spreadsheet is useful for making place cards, too. Photo courtesy of Artisan Events, Inc.
I find that the best way to keep track of the guest list is with a spreadsheet program. I like to have columns for name; address; save-the-date card sent; invitation sent; responded yes or no; and dish requested. The same sheet can also double as a gift tracker so you know what to thank people for and whether you have done so. And you can use it to help you make place cards.
These are only guidelines, of course. Special situations may require a different approach. But you can use them as a road map to get you started on this most important part of the process.
Oct 28, 2009 | Day-of Coordinating, Weddings
Here’s a story from a few years ago (pre-blog):
The bride and groom were moving to Los Angeles the day after the wedding, so the reception theme was “A Farewell to Chicago.” They held the reception in a hall where they had gone to hear many bands, with catering by a well-known Chicago pizza place. Without a full-service caterer, they needed someone to set the tables, hire and supervise the serving staff and bartenders, and generally make things run. I made sure that the hall was ready for the reception, including setting tables for 150 guests, coordinated the caterer, the bar, and the band, and I made sure that the bride, the groom, and their families could have a good time without worrying about anything.
The caterer had not quite brought enough pizza for everyone. I think they underestimated how much people would eat. When the supply of food was dwindling as the line moved through the buffet, I knew I had to act. I whispered to the bride that there was a little problem, and she asked me to take care of it. After consulting with her mother about payment, I asked the catering manager to supply more food. He managed to get it there within a reasonable amount of time, and I don’t think anyone but the bride, her mother, and me knew that there was ever a shortage.
No one went hungry that night!
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