Jun 11, 2012 | wedding planning, Weddings
You might need a little help to get to this point. Photo courtesy of christytylerphotography.com.
Every wedding planner has a calendar or timeline laying out the important steps necessary to plan a wedding and reception. The timeline is an important part of planning your wedding, but there are other equally important things to think about in order to have the wedding you really want. Here is one more of them:
Hiring a wedding planner is the same hiring as any other wedding vendor. Have an idea of the kinds of help you need before you call. You probably won’t have all the answers yet, but that is why you are hiring an event planning professional. If you want someone who knows all about bridal fashion and the latest trends, be sure they are credentialed by one of the bridal planning associations. If, on the other hand, you have your own ideas about style, keep looking until you find a wedding planner with an open mind and innovative ideas. Experience counts, too. It is possible to learn a lot about event planning from books and lectures, but nothing beats hands-on experience. Also, find out if the wedding planner you are thinking about hiring has ever been married. I think that a wedding planner who has gotten married has a better understanding of the process of getting married–and a better understanding of the pitfalls along the way.
Jun 4, 2012 | wedding planning, Weddings
Get what you love for your wedding, not what someone tells you that you need.
Have you ever run across one of those “wedding etiquette” web pages? Some vendors of wedding products have etiquette tips on their websites. Many of them have useful information. But some of them are wedding planning traps.
Watch out for sales pitches disguised as etiquette requirements. For example, an invitation seller might tell you that etiquette “requires” you to have a second, inner envelope for your invitation, which they will be happy to sell you. Or a florist could push etiquette as the reason to have corsages for every female member of your family. I’m just making up examples here to give you an idea of what to look out for. There are many forms this trap could take.
If you want solid etiquette advice, I recommend borrowing an etiquette book from the library or buying one, if you think you’ll use it again. Emily Post has the classic guides to etiquette. You might also enjoy Miss Manners on Painfully Proper Weddings. I’ll write more on real etiquette another day. In the meantime, keep your eyes open for the fake kind.
May 21, 2012 | wedding planning, Weddings
Florists' contracts might have less information that others. Photo by Happy Buddy PhotoArt.
Every wedding planner has a calendar or timeline laying out the important steps necessary to plan a wedding and reception. The timeline is an important part of planning your wedding, but there are other equally important things to think about in order to have the wedding you really want. Here is one more of them:
Remember when hiring vendors that this is a business proposition, and deal with them in a business-like manner. Never, ever give any vendor a down payment until you have a written contract and until you understand and agree with everything in the contract. A contract should contain, at a minimum, the vendor’s name, business address, and telephone number; an itemized list of services the vendor will supply and dates and times the services will be provided; and the cost for those services and when payment is due. Some smaller businesses, especially busy ones like florists and bakeries, sometimes have minimal information on their contracts. Feel free to hand write missing information on the contract they give you, and get them to initial it. You should also initial any changes. Contracts are also negotiable. You will not be able to negotiate everything you want into a contract, but if there is something important you want, try to get it included. Or if there is a clause you can’t live with, you can try to negotiate it out.
May 7, 2012 | Day-of Coordinating, wedding planning, Weddings
I am asked sometimes why anyone should hire a wedding planner.
Beautiful wedding day. Photo by Magical Moments Photography.
After all, you can probably do all the planning yourself. With some time, a few organizational skills, and the ability to see the project through, you can plan your wedding by yourself. Of course, it is a large job that takes a lot of time and attention. Most people find the process momentarily frustrating. At the same time, it can be very rewarding. You might even find that it is a lot of fun.
On the other hand, when it comes to day-of wedding coordination, almost everyone needs someone to do the job. In the past when brides were typically younger, the mother of the bride often took care of the coordinating. Sometimes the Maid of Honor does all the work. These days, though, most couples want to allow their families and friends to enjoy the wedding day and not have to deal with the details.
Even if your wedding is simple and straightforward, if you hire a day-of coordinator, you are also hiring a professional consultant who can help you with the planning. When I am working with a couple, I tell them that once they hire me, they can call me or send me an e-mail any time if they need guidance or a vendor referral or just someone to bounce an idea off of. My function is to make sure that the wedding goes smoothly, and that means that I start working toward that goal as soon as I am hired. If I can prevent costly mistakes or solve a problem months in advance, then I am doing my job as day-of coordinator.
Also, I have resources that you might not have. Especially if your wedding is non-traditional or if you want to make sure it is environmentally friendly, I have access to vendors and other resources that you might not know about.
Maybe you have been to a wedding and thought it all went so smoothly that there was no need for a coordinator. That is actually the highest compliment you can pay to a day-of wedding coordinator. From the point of view of the guests, it should all look effortless, and that means that someone has put all the details together into a beautiful wedding day.
Apr 2, 2012 | Day-of Coordinating, Weddings
I got a last-minute call to coordinate a wedding recently. It was for a couple who got engaged in October, so they had a very short planning period. It was stressful for them, but they were smart planners and had a gorgeous wedding day.
The hall at the Kenilworth Club, waiting for guests.
The ceremony was at the bride’s parish church with the reception at the Kenilworth Club, one of my favorite reception locations. Here are a few photos:
The hall set for cocktails with guitarist Jim Perona playing in the background.
The cake was from Oak Mill Bakery with flowers by Four Finches.
A La Carte catered lunch.
This part was the coordinator's job.
The favors were a tribute to the groom, a geologist, and the place where the couple met.
Swing Assembly played for dancing in the afternoon. And I hope to have some professional photos from Peter Coombs to share with you sometime soon.
Mar 19, 2012 | Day-of Coordinating, wedding planning, Weddings
You can greet your guests with cocktails before the ceremony as they did here. Photo by Paul Grigonis, pplusgphoto.com.
A couple of recent client weddings have skipped the usual cocktail hour between the ceremony and the reception. There have been various reasons for this choice, but I think one of the most important reasons is the five-hour time slot imposed by so many venues.
If you are venue shopping now, their time restrictions are an important thing to know before you sign a contract. Some venues will give you the whole day until their closing time. At least one I know of divides the day into two slots so they can do four weddings every weekend. Most, however, seem to like to give you any five hours you want, plus set-up and clean-up time.
You can definitely have a wonderful wedding and reception in five hours. If it seems a little short, one of the things you can jettison is the cocktail hour. If you were planning to take photos during the cocktail hour, that means finding another time for them. Doing them before the ceremony might not be an option if you and your fiance are not seeing each other before the ceremony, so if that is the case, your options are more limited. If not, consider doing photos before the ceremony and going straight from the ceremony to the reception.
Talk to your planner or coordinator about how to make the day’s schedule work best for you. She or he should be able to tell you what your best options are.
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