“But You’re So Calm!”

It’s not a new photo, but my attitude hasn’t changed: I’m being calm here. Photo courtesy of Artisan Events, Inc.

Here’s a funny story from last year’s wedding season.  I was introduced to the brother of one of the brides before the ceremony began.  I had been doing my thing for a couple of hours already, and everything was in place when I had the chance to stop and meet him.  We shook hands, and when he found out what my role was he said, “You’re the planner??  But you’re so calm!”

I’m not entirely sure how he thought I should behave.  Maybe there’s a stereotype of a wedding planner who runs around chaotically looking flustered.  (I’ve never run into one who behaves that way in real life.)  But he certainly said it in an approving way, which was quite flattering.

So, I said to him, “Well, yes, I am calm.  If I’m not calm, then no one else is going to be calm, either.  If I’m running around in a tizzy, everyone else is going to be feeling unsettled, too.”  He nodded and agreed, although it was clear he hadn’t thought of it that way before.

I really do taking being calm seriously when I’m on site for a wedding.  There are a lot of emotions packed into a wedding day, and people can be on edge.  Someone has to be the anchor and the ground wire for all of that, and that’s what I try to be.  (Professional officiants are also really, really good at this.)

And there are a lot of moving parts that sometimes people worry about.  As one of my clients said one time, “We have outsourced all our worrying to Lisa.”  I loved that!  Yes, you can outsource your worrying to me.  I won’t worry; I’ll just take care of stuff for you so no one has to worry.  That’s my job.  And I’ll be very, very calm, while I’m doing it, too.