It’s Not All Weddings

November 30th, 2010

I know I focus a lot on the weddings I work on in this blog.  That’s because I like weddings and I do a lot of them.  But I do other things, too.  If you’re looking for party help for a bar or bat mitzvah, anniversary party, birthday party, holiday party, or any other kind of celebration, please feel free to get in touch with me.

Rerun: Oh, Those Invitations!

November 15th, 2010

I get a lot of questions from my clients about when to send out invitations.  Here are a few guidelines to get you through this part of wedding or party planning:

You can send out save-the-date cards (or e-mails, or you can make phone calls) about six months in advance.  If you have guests who might come from overseas or who have other situations that require more notice, you can alert them to the date a year in advance.  Most people have trouble planning anything more than a year in advance, though, so if you tell people farther ahead than that, expect to remind them at about the 6 to 9 month mark.

Be prepared to put your invitations into the mail six to eight weeks before the event. Leave yourself ample time to address all the invitations if you are doing them yourself.  If you are hiring a calligrapher to address them, be sure to ask him or her how much time is needed for the number of invitations you have.  Then add a week, just to be on the safe side.

Your RSVP deadline should be about three weeks ahead of the wedding or party.  (If you only plan to get the invitations into the mail six weeks ahead of the wedding date, you can get away with about 2 weeks for the RSVP date.)  Your caterer will probably want a final head count between a week and two weeks ahead of the date, and you want to leave yourself enough time to call the people who have not responded by the deadline.

And there will be people who don’t respond.  Be sure to leave yourself enough time to call them and just check in.  You don’t have to remind them that they have been rude enough not to reply.  Just ask them if they plan to be there (and what they plan to eat if you have asked people to tell you in advance).  Don’t skip this step.  You don’t want to have people show up if you haven’t planned to feed them.

Your spreadsheet is useful for making place cards, too. Photo courtesy of Artisan Events, Inc.

Your spreadsheet is useful for making place cards, too. Photo courtesy of Artisan Events, Inc.

I find that the best way to keep track of the guest list is with a spreadsheet program.  I like to have columns for name; address; save-the-date card sent; invitation sent; responded yes or no; and dish requested.  The same sheet can also double as a gift tracker so you know what to thank people for and whether you have done so.  And you can use it to help you make place cards.These are only guidelines, of course.  Special situations may require a different approach.  But you can use them as a road map to get you started on this most important part of the process.

Re-Run: Sign on the Dotted Line

November 2nd, 2010

I’m re-running some old posts since I think they have some useful information.  Here’s one from this time last year:

This bakery had a good contract--and good chocolate!  Photo by Carasco Photography.

This bakery had a good contract--and good chocolate! Photo by Carasco Photography.

I want to share with you some information I give to many of my clients.  It’s on a subject that is hardly glamorous, but is very, very important:  Contracts.  I’m not a contract lawyer, but this is what I have learned by experience.

When you are planning a big celebration, you will have to deal with a number of vendors, and each one of them should give you a contract.  And each one will require a certain amount of your attention.  You should read carefully each contract you are given.  Make sure you agree with every point in it before you sign it.  Because once you sign it, it becomes a legally binding document that might be very hard to get out of.  It’s much better to negotiate it before you sign it.

And all contracts are negotiable, no matter what your vendor says.  The point of a contract is to come to an agreement between parties, so don’t be afraid to negotiate your part of the agreement.  I’m not saying that you can get everything you want into (or out of) every contract, but you don’t have to take whatever they give you without a murmur if you don’t like it.

Every contract should contain a certain minimum of information.  It should have the vendor’s name, address, and phone number on it.  If the vendor wants you to contact them some other way than by phone, that information should also be on the contract so it is easily available.  The contract should also state clearly exactly what the vendor is going to do for you and when they are going to do it.  Likewise, it should say how much you are expected to pay and when.

It is a good idea to include details in the contract:  When and where will deliveries be made?  Will the vendor only bring their goods to the venue or will they also set things up?  If you change your mind and want something extra, what happens?  And what will it cost?  What happens if one party or the other fails to live up to the agreement?  Finally, the contract should be signed and dated by both parties.

Florists and bakeries (in my experience) are notorious for offering incomplete contracts.  Often, small shops don’t have the resources to put together complete contracts.  In this case, you should not hesitate to hand write the missing information onto whatever they give you.  It protects both of you.

I learned some of this from my dealings with a certain florist.  What passed for a contract with the bride from this florist was just a list of floral options  and prices with one of them circled.  There was no information on delivery or set-up.  I understood from the bride that the florist was going to bring all the floral arrangements into the venue and I would set them up.  I even discussed delivery with the shop in the week before the wedding.  Oddly, no one mentioned that the centerpieces weighed between 50 and 100 pounds, somewhat more than I can carry on my own.  The owner of the shop showed up with the centerpieces, carried them down a flight of steps, and placed them where they belonged.  I thought all was well.  Five days after the wedding, I got an e-mail from the floral shop asking for additional payment because the owner had had to do extra work on the delivery.  Fortunately, I had a copy of the contract (such as it was) and was able to explain that they should not expect to recoup their losses from me.  It also might have been better if a complaint had been made on the spot so I could have solved the problem before it happened.

That experience is also one of the reasons I always insist on having copies of every contract that a bride has with her vendors.  I can head off a lot of trouble if I know exactly what is expected of each vendor.  So, read your contracts, make sure you agree with their contents, and send a copy on to your planner.  You’ll be happy you did.