An Interesting Correlation

August 18th, 2009
The bride's friends made the centerpieces for this wedding.

The bride's friends made the centerpieces for this wedding.

A friend of mine who recently got married told me something she learned in the course of planning her wedding.  For some reason or another, she was talking to a lawyer who specializes in divorce (having nothing to do with her wedding, of course!)  They were discussing the size of her wedding budget, which I understand was quite modest, since she works as a free-lancer and her husband is a graduate student.  This lawyer told her that he had noticed an interesting correlation in the course of his work.  According to him, the larger the wedding budget is, the shorter the marriage is likely to be.  I can’t account for this surprising parallel, but I can say this:  If you are planning a wedding on a small budget, you can at least console yourself that, statistically speaking, your marriage is more likely to be a lasting one.

What I Know About Tipping

August 3rd, 2009
"Shall we tip the limo driver?"  Photo by Happy Buddy PhotoArt.

"Shall we tip the limo driver?" Photo by Happy Buddy PhotoArt.

I get asked sometimes about tipping wedding or party vendors.  Now, I’m not an etiquette expert, but here is what I know.  My rule of thumb is that it is never wrong to tip someone if they have provided you with exceptional service.  If someone goes above and beyond the call of duty, you will never be wrong to show your appreciation in a tangible way.  For most vendors, however, tipping is still optional.

There are some exceptions to that last rule, however.  Food servers, hair stylists, and drivers are some of the people whom it is customary to tip.  Your catering contract probably includes a gratuity.  If so, then you have already tipped the staff.  If you want to show further appreciation, you may, but it is not necessary.

If your stylist or limo driver is also the owner of the company, then it is not customary to tip, because they already have the full benefit of the payment you are making.  I heard recently about a hair stylist who works for herself.  She was going to charge $150 for a simple updo and then wanted an 18% tip on top of that.  I recommended to the bride-to-be that she find a different stylist, as in that case the tip is a form of highway robbery.

I understand that it is also not customary to tip musicians.  But the first rule still applies:  Anyone who gives exceptional service might merit a reward.  But don’t stress over tips.  Most independent contractors don’t expect them and they are a very pleasant surprise if you do give one.

Event Planning on a Budget - Part Four: Will You Have a Drink?

July 7th, 2009

One way to control costs at your event is by considering the beverages.

Non-alcoholic beverages are relatively inexpensive and may be included in your food package. Bar service can either be very expensive or relatively inexpensive, depending on your venue and the way you procure it. Many venues have bar packages: beer, wine, and soda; mid-price open bar; and top shelf, among others. I have not generally found that it is possible to negotiate these prices with a venue that has standard pricing. But, if you are on a budget, the beer, wine, and soda option is generally affordable. If you’re on a really tight budget, you might have to forego alcohol entirely, or just do a champagne toast. One way to liven up a beer and wine package is to add a signature cocktail to the package. This can often be done without a large additional cost.

Champagne toast.  Photo courtesy of Artisan Events.

Champagne toast. Photo courtesy of Artisan Events. Inc.

If your venue allows you to provide the alcohol, you have even more options. The least expensive of these is to purchase the alcohol yourself at a liquor store. Be sure to choose a store with good prices that allows returns of unopened bottles. This option also gives you maximum flexibility in your choice of what to serve. There are even a few liquor stores that provide event service. They will sell you the liquor, deliver it to the venue, provide glassware at no extra charge, and pick up anything left the next day to give you a refund or credit. These establishments are becoming a rarity, however, so don’t be surprised if you need to do the heavy lifting yourself.

One thing I do not recommend for keeping costs under control is to have a cash bar. As the host of the party, it is your job to provide food and drink. If your resources dictate a limited supply of alcohol, your guests will live with the restriction. The quantity of alcohol served is not a measure of how good the party is.  Serve what you can afford and you will have enough left over to do whatever else is important to you at your event.

Event Planning on a Budget - Part Three: What’s for Dinner?

March 19th, 2009
Dinner is served! Photo by Carasco Photography.

Dinner is served! Photo by Carasco Photography.

After the location, food is probably your largest event cost. And many caterers will try to make sure that you spend at least half of your total budget on food. It doesn’t have to be that way, though. There are many ways you can keep your food and drink costs under control and still have a festive and hospitable event.  We’ll look at food here and look at beverages in a future post.

Consider Day and Time

The easiest way to control costs is to consider time of day. Breakfast, brunch, and lunch are generally less expensive meals than dinner. I believe that this is as much a matter of social convention as of intrinsic cost, but you can still take advantage of it. A late morning or early afternoon wedding can be followed by lunch. An anniversary celebration can be a brunch party. For the early risers among us, breakfast celebrations are unusual and offer great menu options.

Depending on your event, you might also choose not to serve a meal, but to limit your food service to snacks. Be careful, though: Many caterers will give you the same price for heavy hors d’oeuvres as for a full meal. A traditional morning wedding used to be followed by punch and cake. You can use or elaborate on this tradition to have a nice, inexpensive party.

Choose Your Caterer Carefully

Quality food from an excellent chef.

Quality food from an excellent chef. Photo courtesy of Artisan Events, Inc.

This leads me to my second easy way to control food costs, and that is your choice of caterer. In Chicago, there are the big downtown caterers and then there are the smaller outfits. The big ones are on the preferred vendor list of every venue in the city. Fortunately, some of the smaller ones have made it onto the lists of various venues, as well. If you can’t figure out with a little internet research which caterer falls into which category, ask an event professional. Personally, I have dealt with enough of each kind of caterer to know one from the other. The smaller caterers are more likely to be willing to work within your budget. They are also likely to have personal service and high quality food. As with any vendor, of course, check their references first and taste their food before you sign a contract and hand over a down payment.

Know Your Budget

One more very important thing you can do to control your costs is to have a fairly firm budget number in mind before you talk to a caterer. Every client I have ever told this to says, “But I don’t know what it costs.” That’s the secret: You tell the caterer how much you want to spend and it is up to them to come up with a menu within your budget. Don’t expect caviar on a frugal budget, of course, and do discuss your target budget number with any potential caterer. A good one will be able to tell you if what you are asking for is even reasonable. If you don’t go in with a budget number, they will start at the high end. You can make adjustments as you go along, of course, but it is easiest to start with your budget amount.

One way to think about your catering budget is to break it down into two (or three parts). First, consider how much per person you want to spend on food alone. Compare your per person price to what you might pay in a restaurant. At a highest-end restaurant, you could easily spend $100 per person for dinner, or more. But at a high quality neighborhood restaurant, you can get away with $40 per person. Of course, the prices at a restaurant also include a different kind of overhead from the caterer, but this gives you a way to start thinking about the costs.

Beautiful dessert.  Photo courtesy of Artisan Events.

Beautiful dessert. Photo courtesy of Artisan Events, Inc.

The second part of your catering budget is service–what you are paying for the chef, servers, and other kitchen workers. The most up-front caterers charge service per server per hour, and they will break this number down on your estimate. A less scrupulous practice is to charge service at a flat cost per guest. This method does not reflect the caterer’s actual expenses and may end up costing you more. A third method is to charge service as a percentage of food costs.  If a caterer charges a flat rate per guest, consider looking elsewhere.

If you want to cut down on service costs, you might consider buffet service, which requires fewer people to give smooth service. On the other hand, caterers generally must provide more food for a buffet than for plated service, which might offset the savings provided by fewer servers. Talk to your caterer if buffet is an option for you and see if a buffet will offer you savings. It depends on a lot of factors: price of labor, price of food, number of guests, etc. A conscientious caterer can give you a comparison of the prices.

The third part of any estimate you receive may be rental charges, depending on your venue and your caterer. These charges should show up separately from food and service on your catering estimate. Caterers with large staffs will sometimes break out the rental list with prices so you can see what they expect you to pay. Most caterers will not do this, however, and if you want to compare the details, you may need either a rental catalogue and an Excel spreadsheet or the help of a professional. I have actually broken down rental costs for a client and compared them to the prices I would expect to pay to help her to see the true costs of the proposal. Rentals can be a substantial sum of money, so don’t overlook the necessity if you are at a venue that doesn’t supply everything you need. There are ways to control cost here, too, although not as many. You can rent flat linens, instead of glossy, and you can rent the least expensive china, silverware, and glassware. You can also shop around among rental houses for good prices. Be aware, however, that there are rental companies that offer good prices but substandard service. Get recommendations or references for rentals so you are not stuck with poor service.

Always start with your food budget number before you begin your shopping. You may have to revise this number as you get a feel for realistic costs, but don’t believe anyone who tells you that you can’t feed a crowd for less than $100 per person in food costs. If you are creative and are working with a flexible caterer, you can have a celebration to remember without breaking the bank.